I am still pretty new to the mom party, but this I know for sure…all a mom ever wants to hear is “I love you. Thank you for caring so much. You were right”.
My mom lives over 1800kms away and we totally forgot to send her flowers (I still might on payday!), so this year David and I came up with something better; a public recognition about how great you are! Mom, here are just a few of the millions things you taught us and we can now say “you were right”…
You have a choice – laugh or cry, but get over it.
It doesn’t matter how fancy your house is or how many countries you have vacationed in, under all the happiness and smiles, we all have a story. Times when pain, suffering, depression, heartache or fear ruled our lives and pulling through it all in one piece seemed impossible. When we lived these moments, you were there to help us vent, look for solutions or talk through our feelings. You helped us to make a choice. We often laughed off the petty things and ugly cried the deep stuff, but we knew we had to get over it. Learn the lesson, feel the feelings and keep going.
I’m your mom. I have to love you but I don’t have to like you.
I am certain I repeat this in my head daily. I am sorry Mom. I never realized how irritating I was at just 2 years old, but man, I get it now! It’s okay that you didn’t like us when we hit you with our toys or drew on the furniture with markers. It’s okay that we weren’t your favorite people when we missed curfew or lied about who we were out with. Getting tattooed at 17 and inheriting our father’s sailor mouth aren’t some of our best moments, so we are sorry! We love you and know that through it all, you just kept on loving us until you liked us again. So thanks 🙂
Some people will never change. Quit wasting your time hoping for a miracle.
This one has always bothered me because for some dumb reason, I just can’t stop wanting to see the best in people and I get crushed every time. I am sure you have perfected your “I told you so” dance by now, and you have earned that. I can’t change people nor should I waste my time waiting for things I know will never happen. I’m not sure that I have truly learnt this lesson as I struggle with it daily, but I get it. I see your point and I know I have to move on. It is none of my business what other people think of me. I have many wonderful people in my life that deserve and appreciate my attention.
Choose your friends carefully.
I used to think that you didn’t approve of our friends because they were rude or dressed weird. I thought you only wanted us to hang out with the “good kids” so we wouldn’t become sex crazed, tattooed, pot heads before ever graduating high school. Boy, were you ever wrong! Now that we are older, we understand what real friends are and why it is important to not be besties with everyone you meet. We’ve moved alot and have met thousands of people…Dave would say millions…and yet we both have a very very small group of people that we trust. We’ve had bad friends and good friends. Ones who have taught us everything we could ever need in jail and others who opened their hearts and homes and shown us real love. You’ve taught us to surround ourselves with positive people who bring out our best qualities and share similar goals in life. I think my besties are pretty spot on. Dave may have missed this memo…some of his friends are still a bit shady 🙂
Watch what you eat.
This one we have down to a science. We watch the double cheeseburgers loaded with mayo and peanut butter go in our mouths happily. We watch the gooey eggs benedict smothered with hollandaise sauce and the perfectly deep fried sweet chili shrimp get devoured. We even see the sour lime that chases down those tequila shots. Oh we watch what we eat alright….but I get the feeling we may have misunderstood this one 🙂
Always answer your phone.
Well…I can’t say either of us follow this one, but we certainly appreciate that you do. Your boy calls you every single day, often twice, and no matter how many times you’ve already heard his stories, you always answer. Not because you are incredibly interested in our boring day-to-day musings and not because you never know when you will hear from us again….cause lets face it, you are guaranteed to get a call in a few hours. No, you answer because we matter. Because nothing else you are doing is more important than hearing from your crazy kids. We tell you the good things that make you proud, the hilarious things that make you roll your eyes and even the ugly things that break your heart. If there is one thing we both know for certain, it is that we can tell you anything and even though we hear you cringing sometimes, we know that it will forever be okay. What we say, what we think and how we feel will always matter to you…and that is the absolute best feeling you can give a child.
I know you often feel like you have failed us, but Mom, please know that we have never felt this way and have always always always loved you. We have made poor choices…quite a few of them actually…but they are certainly not a reflection of you. Because of your love and support, we are both comfortable taking risks and experiencing failure. We aren’t afraid to disappoint you because you will always find the positive and make everything better. You have given us the freedom to learn and become our own people. We can only hope that we have made you proud…most of the time 🙂
We love you Ma! And I will always be your baby girl (and Arlene’s too!)